When things don’t go your way, what do you do?

One of my coaches said true success is inner peace. And how true he is.

When things go your way, when you reach the success – the level you were looking for, it’s easy to tie success to that ‘thing’. A job title, a house, a car, having dinner, exercising. 

Successful people know how to live their dreams. They create visions, evolve, and shift their future. They dig deeper and deeper when things get tough. When something changes, feels amiss, they put in more effort, and yet it feels harder.

And many don’t ask for help.

What happens when things don’t go your way, after that?

We expect our bodies and minds to remain the same. That the ‘normal’ we know about ourselves isn’t going to change, that much. Yet disruption is occurring more frequently and more of my clients are finding the success track miserable. They are losing their heart in what they do and are exhausted.

Yet, you wouldn’t know that from the outside.

Why your mental fitness is as important as physical fitness

I’ve been blown away to the positive impact how mental fitness training has shifted my own thinking about success and performance, and it leads me to the phrase ‘true success is inner peace’ by being able to recover faster from setbacks.

Yesterday morning we were euphoric that we were ready to exchange on our new house – our dream house. At lunchtime, we had a telephone call which changed everything. The surveyor had found significant problems with the house we were purchasing. At that moment everything changed. In my usual, I’m going to contact everyone to be transparent mode and hold on the purchase, I was struck by how quickly my go-to was my mental fitness training. Yes, I’m sad for us as a family and the new adventure we were planning, but notice the gift this gave us.

There are client stories too – one of my clients secured a new role after 12 months of not finding the right company or role. Another finds it valuable to check into their negative thoughts before they spiral out of control.

Our thoughts are not always true.


Throughout the positive and challenging moments that we all have, positive recognition and reinforcement does result in improved self-awareness, happier people, and happier life. It takes practice, but my goodness it’s absolutely worth it.

This week, think of the most recent time when something didn’t go the way you wanted. On the back of a sheet of paper write down the negative thoughts, actions, and how you felt. On the front, write down what you learned, the gift in what happened, and any positive reinforcement that comes to mind. Keep the gifts in front of you as a reminder. You can also use this process as a way of journalling.

If you’d like to find out what’s sabotaging your thoughts, take the free quiz here. Everyone has these saboteurs. This quiz will raise your awareness to yours and help you recognise them when they creep up.

Like all fitness programmes, it isn’t an easy ride, but I can tell you personally that it creates a positive change in you that you will recognise, and an inner peace to knowing that you are able to navigate your thoughts. And that’s what life is all about. Happiness, inner peace and success.

Remember this. In a world of chaos, anchor yourself to your vision – your big dream, your why. The world needs visionaries, changemakers, and dreamers right now – welcome. (read 33 pieces of counterintuitive advice).

This morning, I opened my mental fitness programme to 1-1 as well as the team programme. If you are interested, please get in touch.


Photo Credit: Alok Sharma on Unsplash


Juliet is an award-winning executive coach, consultant, and leader. Her mission is to shape a million futures by liberating dreams, igniting possibilities, and elevating your extraordinary.

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